Scrutiny

A part of my life was throwing doldrums on me with its dishevelled look that wanted me to back off the war that I waged with it. Yet another part wanted to fight, resurrect from the ashes of the sins of the past and wage a war against the evil me. The good part in me wanted to triumph and the bad me wanted to slog and dint want me to recuperate from the point where I was clinging on.

To soothe the ailing mind, I really wanted a break. The short but sweet vacation really seemed to serve the purpose. Munching on goodies despite having a very 'petite' frame, was just the right thing to do inside the theatre especially you have got nothing better to do than watching an awesomely boring movie. The journey, be it in the rickety rackety old bus that swayed last bus riders like in a water bike or in the air conditioned car that provided seating from which metal and cushioned parts poked into the you-know-where are all parts in life worth relishing when you get screwed by profs from all sides. The cold air from the AC vents and light music playing from the car music system had done its job.

A journey makes you learn things. Wandering in the city, fascinated by the lights and its grandeur, my eyes rested on the real India. The revelation of what the life of people were, those living in absolute poverty and in conditions unimaginable to us who leads a life devoid of peripheral miseries.

The quote of Gandhiji 'India lives in her villages' felt a bit out of context here. The real Indian is what we see in the urban slums. An evident eye-opener for me, among others who are yet to understand how fortunate you are and yet cribbing on what you do not have. Thank Him and count your blessings.

Well, everything happens for a cause. Causes that can make you work it out for an effect.

Life Aghast!

It has been more than 3 long weeks since my fingers went into the rhythm of feeling the keys of my prodigiously insane lappy. All these days were spent either on memorizing the ways on how I would create my own brand on the shelves of some crappy department store where idiotic consumers would shed out their hard earned bucks for getting themselves robbed or creating balance sheets and P/Ls which never bothered to balance at all.

       

These were the days where I developed a inclination towards creating (or rather fooling) consumers and had bred a contempt to all numbers in the world, thanks to the unscrupulous tallying prowess I possessed. 

So, my days of freedom, I thought was just a falsified veil of happiness. From the day I reached home, time was passing as if it was just the duration of a wink of the eye. With this thought in mind, I was just lying low, or rather was made to lie low as the happiness and feelings of being home was dampened as I tore days off from the calendar.

The journey seemed ages to finish reaching back to place of wonders, taking into account when things of that sort seemed happening.

What lay in front of me seemed to be vast as an ocean, what life had to offer seemed to be mysterious and it is when I felt that it is just going to get fine in a matter of time. Like everyone, I have been thinking to take studies seriously. It has been years and years of resolution, which seemed like a promise unkempt.

The extreme warfare I had done with books made remind myself of wounded soldier on the battleground, eager to leave the field into the comfy warmth of the bed at home had to offer. But the warrior in me wanted to wage more battles, which I was sure that would rip open the unhealed wounds of the wars of the yesteryear.